It was 6:15 in the morning in her tiny apartment in the alley, and Nancy-cat was meowing to wake her up and fill the food bowl. Oh Nancy…I couldn’t even see my baby’s face – Lily exclaimed. And she suddenly noticed her eyes getting wet. Lily cried like a child that fell from the swing in a playground.
She cried like her whole world had fallen apart, because it did.
Lily dried her tears and started her day like usual, she was an adult, it was stupid to feel like that because of a dream. The day was passing by, and her students came as always, it was book club day, but she wasn’t paying that much attention to it, her mind was fixed in her dream and all the happiness she felt, that was now gone.
Jakes pretty face was always in her mind, so she wished she could dream about him again. Every night from that Wednesday of April on, she would think about Jake and pray to God to show him in her dreams again. Night after night she kept having dreams about her classes, her books, but never Jake, he was out of her reach.
As the weeks started passing by, it was hard for her to sleep. Lily was waking up in the middle of the night frustrated because she couldn’t come back to her beautiful life and her anger kept her awake for the rest of the night. After three months, she couldn’t sleep anymore.
Dr. Joseph Ackerman, Tabitha’s psychiatrist, gave her pills to help her to sleep. And for some time, that was enough, because the pills were preventing her from dreaming at all. And not dreaming was better than having the hope of finding her family and being frustrated and angry when was not there.
So, Lily started feeling better little by little, and slowly her life was getting back in the trails.
On a Tuesday in September, her car was borrowed by her sister. Tabitha had a car crash - nothing bad, she said - but the car needed to be fixed, and “I don’t know what to do with Tommy without the car”.
Tommy was her adorable toddler, very nice and easy-going, but chubby and heavy as a toddler could be, Lily knew that well. She was her sisters’ best helper, taking care of Tommy when she needed some time alone with her husband or whatever. Lily was used to do her favors whenever Tabitha required it, as Lily was doing now by borrowing her own car. And she really didn’t mind helping, she was happy to be useful. And Lily only uses her car to go to her practices, or at the weekend for the grocery and eventual brunch with friends. Thus, that week Lily was happily using the train to travel around.
Lily was sitting at the window in the train on her way to her practice, she had her headphones, and she was listening to an audiobook about meditation practices, something that she started to do as a suggestion from Dr. Ackerman, to improve the quality of her sleep. That’s when something in her peripheric vision caught her attention.
It was Jake. He was wearing a black suit and carrying a backpack, walking by the platform of the station where her train was passing by. She stood up in a jump to go after him, but it was too late. The doors were closed, and the train was slowly moving away. In a moment of despair, she yelled “Jake!” and to her surprise, he looked back.
Then in a matter of seconds, she lost sight of him.
Lily got out of the train in the next station and took one on the opposite side. She knew it was a long shot, and thought to herself – it can’t be my Jake – but she couldn’t ignore that he was a real existing human being, and not just a projection of her mind.
At the next station, she looked for him everywhere and outside in the street. No sign of Jake. Her heart was aching with disappointment, but nothing could take her hope away after that day; she was seeing the love of her life once again, and this time for real. It was possible.
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